Friday, February 3, 2012

Caleb..."servant of the Lord"

The first blog I've posted about my children was about Madison.  This one is about Caleb and really dear to my heart.  Please read below to find out about my precious Caleb.

"servant of the Lord"  is the meaning of  Caleb
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There is a man that was dear to our family.  He used to do Bible studies and Prayer meetings in our home but he also lead a revival at Bethel. He once told me that if I had dreams with snakes or serpents in them to start praying over them and pleading the blood over them because it's often times a sign that someone is trying to use witch craft against you or curse you.  Last week I had a dream I was at a park at night with the kids which is in and of itself odd but anyway, I was talking to someone and Caleb (my 5 year old) climbed up the slide. It had a tunnel over it. He started screaming and came running down the slide. He had a bite mark on his cheek that had 2 holes in it. I looked up in there and there was a snake up in there. I woke up after that but I started praying over Caleb. I don't know if you ever heard the story of what I went through when I was carrying him but satan really tried to keep him from entering this world.

A couple of different times when I was carrying Caleb, I had symptoms of a miscarriage. From the excruciating pain all the way to the visible signs. The last time it happened, my Dr. sent me back for an ultra sound. I should have been about 8 weeks. The tech starts the US and can not pick up a heart beat or see a baby. She does an internal US and same results. She tried for 30 minutes to try and detect a hint of a heartbeat or see any signs of a baby and could not. I could tell it didn't look good. My Dr. calls me into his office instead of back to the exam room so naturally my heart sank to my shoes. Jeremy was there with me and the Dr. said, it appears you've lost the baby but the sack is still there. So we need to talk about scheduling you for a D&C to clean out what remains in there. He said, we drew blood when you came in and the results will be back in the morning and from what I'm seeing, your HCG levels should be dropping back down now. Come back in tomorrow and we'll go over you blood work and get your D&C scheduled. That night I'm so upset I can't think straight. I called my mom sobbing and told her what was going on and told her, you can tell the family if you want but I don't want to talk to anyone. I don't want to have to repeat this story over and over. I need to deal with it myself and I just can't talk to anyone about it right now. Tell everyone I'm sorry but I will not be answering my phone tonight. Jeremy held me and I cried myself to sleep. The next day I woke up in a better mood but still down. About halfway through the morning I felt led t start quoting scriptures over my belly. I would quote ""Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." Jeremiah 1:5
and the one that says "Ye are the righteousness of God in Christ" only I would say "Caleb is the righteousness of God in Christ. He was formed in God's image and has a purpose. He shall live and not die."
Psalm 118:7 I will not die but live, and will proclaim what the LORD has done. only I would say, "Caleb will not die but live and proclaim what the Lord has done." I would keep repeating these verses and prayers over my belly throughout the day. We get to the Dr.s office and my Dr.'s nurse pokes her head  out and says, "would you mind repeating the US? Your HCG levels are still increasing." I have a nervous laugh and say of course I don't mind. So again, the Dr. calls us back to his office and says, I just want to dot my i's and cross my t's. I don't want to schedule you for this procedure without 100% certainty of what I feel has happened and these numbers have put a little doubt in my mind. It still doesn't look good based on the US but I could not sleep at night if I wasn't 100% certain. I go back for the US and could see the tech was not looking forward to this session. I imagine it's difficult giving expectant moms gloomy news and having to be the "definitive" answer. I lay down on the table and less than 3 seconds she says, " Um...wait a minute....is that?....I have a heartbeat!" I started crying hysterically and she's trying to calm me down so she can continue. A couple more swipes over my tummy and there he is. Measuring at the perfect gestation just floating around in there and seeing that little heartbeat was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. I knew he was called and destined to be here.

This was my 1'st experience with the devil trying to take his life. The next time, I was at a used car lot looking at vehicles. We had a small car and was fine for the 3 of us but Caleb was a couple months from being due and we would need more space. For some reason, Jeremy took the car to work so that left me with his old Ford pick up. I had dropped Olivia off at the day care and went to the Lemon Lot to look at what was available. It was early in the morning and no one was out there. I pulled up Really close to the cars on the lot. The Truck was facing East to West and the cars on the lot were facing North and South so the Truck and the van I was looking at formed a T. I put the truck in park and stepped out. I left the drivers side door open so I could just get back in really quickly. Well, I'm checking the van out and make my way to the front of it to read what the sign in the window says and the truck slips into reverse on it's own. It pins me between the truck door ( the tip of the door is pushing in on my belly) and the front end of the van. It was squeezing on both sides of my belly. The door of the truck on one side and the side of the van on the other. All kinds of gruesome scenes play through my mind and then I gain my wits and somehow am able to pull my belly out and my knee gets pinned instead. I yank my knee out and run around to the passenger side and slide in to move the truck forward thinking it's going to keep going and squish all the vehicles into each other. I stopped the catastrophe from happening and drove myself to the hospital. Very shaken up. They were more worried about my knee and I was more worried about Caleb. They hook me up to monitors and he's just fine.

THEN, after he was born, his PKU test came back abnormal. They repeated it 2 or 3 more times and again they came back abnormal and we are sent to the Children's hospital in Birmingham. They explain to me they are testing him for a condition that is commonly referred to as "wasting disease" or Congenital Adrenal Hyperplasia. Basically, the body can not process the salt it makes and causes the baby to dehydrate and die. It's very common in Jews (my husband is half Jewish) but typically, unless both parents are carriers, the baby is only a carrier but the fact the he had failed 4 PKU tests concerned them. I had to carry my baby into this cold sterile room and watch them try to insert an IV into him. His veins are so tiny that it's not working so they stick the bottom of his foot and SQUEEZE 2 vials of blood from his little foot. He screamed, I cried...then they tell me they would have to repeat the test 2 hours later. I guess they inject something into them to see how the babies body responds and if it processes it properly. So the second time, I hand him off to Jeremy and told him he had to take him back, I couldn't watch them do that to him again. Well, long story short, test came back fine and he is just a carrier of this condition.

Then, when he was 3, a friend and I had gotten together and taken our kids to our Church's Fall festival. Our Church is REALLY big on ministering to the kids of the inner city here so there are a lot of families from what they call "the bottom". That show up that night. Madi was a baby and was crying and I bent down to give her her paci and looked back and he was gone. Again, my heart dropped to my shoes. My friend stayed in the lobby with my girls and her boys as I walked around the fellowship Center crammed pack of people and kids in costumes. All I could do was pray that a predator did not see an opportunity and take advantage of it. I had told the kids if for any reason they got separated from me to find some one they knew and trusted and just stay put. After about 15 minutes ( that felt like 15 hours), I found him at the Sr. Citizens booth. I've never been so relieved.

I said all that to say that I know he has a purpose and a calling on his life. I feel like he is attacked more than any of my other children were or are. He has the most tender spirit toward things of God and things having to do with forgiveness. We watched the Grace Card as a family and at the end he BAWLED!!!! I asked him what was wrong because I didn't think as young as he was that he could really comprehend what was taking place in the movie. "He says, I'm happy and sad." I said why are you happy AND sad? He says, "I'm sad that the man lost his child but I'm happy that the daddy forgave that man. He didn't have to do that. That was really nice of him." Naturally, I lost it and started praying that God would guard and protect that side of him. That he would always be sensitive to the things of the Spirit. SO, when I had that dream, I woke up and started praying over him immediately. I don't know who or what would want to attack him but this momma plans on being vigilant and will not back down from praying a hedge of protection over him.


I love my little man so much!  He and his sister are an extension of my heart walking around and growing on the outside of me.  Whatever God has in store for him, I know it's something great!!

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